How to Handle Anxiety—Five steps to start with

By Deyana Hristova

As girls, we constantly feel pressure to be good at school, to have a boyfriend by a certain age, or to be able to cook because “someday your husband will expect you to”. And in some cases, this pressure turns into an anxiety disorder. Multiple studies show that girls are twice as likely to experience anxiety as boys.

Every person experiences anxiety differently. Common symptoms are rapid heart rate, trembling, feeling breathless, and feeling like something is going to hurt you. Acid reflux is also a symptom of anxiety, even though not as common.

When anxiety first hit me, it was unexpected. I didn’t feel stressed, I have just finished my first year of university and was happy at home. Anxiety made me feel helpless and like I was dying many times, which led to me going to the emergency centre four times in four months. Just for the doctors to tell me I’m okay and nothing is wrong with me.

When I experienced all of the symptoms mentioned above, what helped me most was going to a private psychiatrist. When he looked at me, he told me I resembled a ball of nerves. We talked, he asked me questions about my symptoms, my daily routine and my life at home. Then he decided that I need to take anti-depression pills and speak to a psychologist.

In the UK, you have the choice to speak to an NHS psychologist or a private psychologist. I did both. Anything to help me stop my anxiety.

To access Talking Therapies with the NHS you have to either referrer yourself or have your GP refer you. Either way it is an easy process but there is a long waiting list. I waited a month and a half to speak to a professional. In our 30-minute sessions every Wednesday they taught me different techniques how to handle my anxiety alone.

While the private psychologist tried to get to the bottom of my anxiety and see where it comes from. She asked questions that made me cry, laugh and taught me that anxiety is just a fear. And that I should make my fears my friends.

From both therapies these techniques and advices were what helped me most in my fight with anxiety.

1. Accept your feelings

Sometimes it is hard to believe that what you are feeling could be signs of anxiety or depression. It might take time and many appointments with the GP but realising that it is all in your head is the first step of the battle. Speak with your GP, explain your symptoms, and they will prescribe the right treatment for you.

2. Theory A/B

Theory A/B is used while you are having a panic attack. When you are experiencing panic attack, you should stop and think have you been through the same thing before. And if yes, did anything bad happen to you? If not, what is still scaring you now?

3. Breathing techniques and meditation

I was advised to start doing yoga every morning when I wake up and every evening before bed. The breathing technique that helped me most was alternate nostril breathing. Basically, you put your finger over your right nostril and breath in from the left one. Then you unplug the right nostril and put your finger on the left one. And breath out from the right nostril. Pamela Reif's stretch after a stressful day and Yoga for Beginners by YOGATX on YouTube are my go to yoga videos.

4. Talking to a Psychologist

Speaking to someone about your problems is key when experiencing an anxiety disorder. To get all these emotions and thoughts you are having takes some of the weight off your shoulders. And sometimes, you will find that it is easier to speak to a stranger than to someone close to you. The psychologist will give you an objective opinion, professional advice and will respect your feelings. Because your feelings matter.

5. Exercising

Exercising is a good way to keep your body and mind healthy. Exercise produces endorphins — chemicals in the brain that act as natural painkillers — and also improve the ability to sleep, which in turn reduces stress (ADAA, 2000). Pamela Reif's app is a great place to start. It offers a training plan for beginners which is updated with new exercising videos each week.

Fighting anxiety may take days, weeks, months, and even years. Go easy on yourself and take as much time as you need to heal. You can do it.

Anxiety and Depression Association of America (2000). Exercise for Stress and Anxiety | Anxiety and Depression Association of America, ADAA. [online] Adaa.org. Available at: https://adaa.org/living-with-anxiety/managing-anxiety/exercise-stress-and-anxiety.

‌